Equilibrating
With **gestures wildly in the direction of everywhere** all of this going on, seemingly nonstop, I haven’t written much about running lately, or in particular, my running. This is probably as good a time as any to play catch-up.
As has been the case with many a long-distance runner since the earliest days of the pandemic, my running and training shifted considerably in the recent past. With in-person, local, “normal” races being off the table for much of the past 18+ months, my running’s MO quickly changed from being always in training-racing-recovering mode to simply run because it gives me a reason to leave my house (and of course all the reasons pertaining to the bountiful ways in which running helps me relieve stress, sleep better, eat more healthfully, have fewer stomach issues, stay in decent shape), all of that.
I unintentionally kicked-off a running streak back in March 2020, right before the world shut down, and for reasons that I’m honestly not sure I totally understand quite yet, I have kept it going ever since. No doubt part of it is the control piece; with so much out of my control, always, yes, but especially now, it’s reassuring to be able to have some semblance of control over something. There have absolutely been times when it has been hard to get out the door, due to laziness/entropy, my schedule/available windows to run that day, or weather (especially when I was in the midwest over the summer), but I have managed to keep the streak alive. That feels really good.
Perhaps unsurprisingly then, by and large, I haven’t really done much in the way of “fast” running. When Coach Lisa and I were working together earlier in the year and last year, she coached me through some training blocks that were focused on mile or 5k time trials, because remember, most in-person racing, especially in these parts, hadn’t yet returned. Even with these training blocks focused on shorter-for me, faster-for-me TT goals, most of my miles every day, every week, remained as typical bread-and-butter easy, aerobic runs. It has been enough to leave me feeling good and buzzy afterward, sweaty and happy, and not anything that’s going to leave me with hands-on-knees, wondering what (or why) I just got myself into.
Given this approach to my running for the better part of the last 18+ or so months, again perhaps unsurprisingly, I’ve accumulated more yearly distance, and more yearly elevation, than I ever have before. Once ARP reopened to the public last May (2020), I began routinely running there again, free of cars (always a plus); full of space to stay way, far away from people (good, given our COVID circumstances RN); and with plenty of challenges to keep me as, well, challenged as I want to be on any given run. I distinctly remember moving here from Chicago and initially running in the park and not being able to run all the hills in ARP or in Sierra Vista OSP. Being able to run all of it now — however slowly it is on any given day — is deeply gratifying.
It wasn’t until halfway through 2021, after doing the fun mile challenge with Janet late last year and earlier this year, and doing the 5k TT at Byxbee Parkrun during the summer, that I ultimately had what I can only refer to as a come-to-Jesus moment during a couple failed 6mi TT attempts for the virtual Wharf to Wharf race. In thinking about my running and my training for basically all of COVID life, I realized that even when I was “training” to run a fast mile, or a fast 5k TT, or even a fast 6mi TT for WTW, I never truly approached the training as I would for, say, a marathon.
That is to say that even though I was doing the weekly workouts that Coach Lisa prescribed me for all the aforementioned goals (fast mile, fast 5k TT, fast virtual WTW), I never really aligned the rest of my training in any given week (and month) with the end goal in sight. I was doing what I was supposed to be doing, yes, but only kinda-sorta. I was still doing what I wanted to be doing — running what and how I wanted to be running — more often than not. It’s totally on me (and don’t worry, Coach Lisa and I have talked about this!), and I have no reason why it took me so long to come to the realization, but alas. It did.
At any rate, it wasn’t until after this recent moment and finally, really, zooming out and thinking big picture with my running, and talking with some trusty running friends, of course, that I realized what I have already situated myself to do, what I have maybe unknowingly set myself up for more than 18 months ago: leave the short stuff, leave the roads, and return to the trail 50k distance.
“Return” implies I’ve been here before, and I have, but honestly, it feels like a lifetime ago– in December 2014, at Woodside (and freshly [unknowingly] pregnant). I trained that autumn for the Woodside Ramble 50k because a conflict with C’s work’s holiday party thwarted my original CIM plans in early December. Woodside was a couple weeks later; the 50k (and on trails, no less!) was a new-to-me distance and challenge; and it worked with my schedule.
The training was tough, for sure, but I had a blast and learned (read: experienced) the numerous ways that trail ultras differ from road marathons. I finished that race happy and proud (and also tired, that whole early first trimester thing), and I’ve always wanted to return to the distance and training. Now seems as good a time as any, especially since I deferred CIM ‘21 and won’t be toeing the line for a road marathon until MTB ‘22. From a COVID standpoint, right now — even as someone who’s vaccinated — I’m more comfortable with a trail ultra than I am with a large road marathon. (Obviously though, that’s totally on me; do you! I’ll cheer you on!).
I’m still early in training, about 10 weeks out from race day, but I am happy to report so far, so good. Training for a real, live, in-person race has a way of getting me out the door, happily, to climb hills and run on tired legs in a way that isn’t always as readily available when I’m running “just cuz.” It is very difficult, yet very gratifying, fun, and it feels fantastic to be in this place right now.
Admittedly, I know no one cares about my running and training as much as I do, and in the presence of the never-ending shitstorm that is this year, and last year, and the foreseeable future, it feels pretty futile and self-aggrandizing to talk about something like 50k training when there are so many other Way More Important Issues to write about.
Sometimes it’s good to have a change of scenery though. As a consumer of running content — even with the aforementioned Way More Important Issues to read about — I get it. I guess this is my way of saying we’ll see; if you want to read it, I will write it (for all ten of you regular readers! All my love!).
I hope that wherever you are with your running, racing, or training, that it is giving you life right now or at the very least, serving as some sort of equilibrating force to counteract the never-ending All That is Wrong in life right now. It’s a tall order, for sure, but any of us who do this stuff on the regular know that therein lies its power.
