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2015: a look back

2015: a look back

New years is one of my favorite times of the year — it’s in my top 3! — in no small part because it makes me purposefully take stock of what has happened in my life. Obviously, I can (and should) do this all year round, but I think there’s sometimes some sort of calendar magic that comes with some year-end reflection.

All told, I got super lucky with my running in 2015. Going into this year, I was coming hot off the highest mileage I had ever posted in a calendar year — something just shy of 2,620 (easy to remember). I thought that maybe I’d be able to top that this year as I went after a 26.2 PR and my first 50 miler, but right after I ran the 50k in December, I learned I was pregnant, so I quickly put those big mileage and PR plans on hold. Concurrent with the pregnancy announcement were some shitty first trimester annoyances like incessant dizziness, mind-splitting headaches, and the desire to lie horizontally in a cold, dark room, void of any life, with my eyes closed — annoyances that aren’t super conducive to being human, generally speaking, much less to running. Needless to say, though the year began pretty rough in terms of running (and who am I kidding, in terms of feeling like myself), fortunately those shitty annoyances passed, and it seemed like the more pregnant I got, more often than not, the more comfortable running felt. So weird how that worked out.

shakeout-run-from-Keith
TSFM shakeout before TSFM’s 5k at 36 weeks pregnant. SO FUN (PC: Keith)

Suffice it to say that 2015 wasn’t the year for chasing mileage or race PRs; instead, more than anything, it was about running because I wanted to, because I felt like it, and because I enjoyed how it made me feel (pregnant or postpartum). I’ve been doing this stuff long enough now that I don’t expect to PR year after year; it’s just not realistic. Honestly, sometimes running just for the sake of running is pretty damn awesome. 2015 reminded me of that repeatedly.

For the curious ones out there, here’s how each month’s mileage fared. In a few of these months, the mileage includes a few walking miles, but by and large, these numbers are all running. Right, now we’re sitting at over 1,100 for the year. The shakeout:

January: 30.54

February: 70.87

March: 90.75

April: 97.46

May: 128.18

June: 122.99

July: 123.85

August: 36.20 – had the baby early in the month

September: 50.76 – had surgery about a month postpartum

October: 123.02 – yet another surgery about a month after the first

November: 140.34

I was also lucky to be able to run throughout my pregnancy, virtually up until the day I delivered, and I consider myself stupidly fortunate to have been able to resume running as quickly as I have postpartum. Pregnancy is such a game-changer, and the same goes for postpartum; in fact, NPR even recently wrote a story on how childbirth can be considered a type of “extreme” sport and even likened it to marathon running (of course). You really have no idea what it’s (pregnancy and birth, specifically) going to be like, so you also have no idea of how you’re going to feel in the days, weeks, or months (years?) afterward. That said, I am so happy that my postpartum running has been coming along as smoothly as it has and that my body handled an intervention-less labor and delivery as well as it did.

Throughout the pregnancy, I pregnant-raced in a handful of comped races, thanks to various social media ambassador hats I was wearing, and I enjoyed all of them, especially the races where Big Sis participated. The races included the Race to the Row 408k here in San Jose; the she.is.beautiful baby mama stroller 5k, wherein I pushed A and we won the stroller division; the AAUW Wildflower 5k stroller run again with A, wherein she actually got out and ran parts of the race herself (her first time doing that!); the San Luis Obispo half marathon; the ZOOMA Napa Valley half marathon; the SF marathon’s 5k; and postpartum, the Let’s Go 510 10k up in Berkeley; the Mermaid Series’ Sirena 10 miler in SF; and the Berkeley Half Marathon.

When it comes to this year’s running lowlights, only one thing comes to mind – virtually the entire month of January. The aforementioned first trimester stuff knocked me on my ass for a lot of that month, and even thinking about running was dreadful. I was so relieved when that shitty stage passed! All the races I did pregnant or postpartum were for fun, so it’s hard to say that any of them had any low moments. I’m mildly disappointed that ZOOMA won’t be returning to Napa next year, since I kinda vowed to dominate that race next year after blowing up on it in 2014 and running it pregnant this year (and obviously not racing it), but c’est la vie. Out of my control. I’ll find another race to dominate. 🙂

Really, I think I can say every race I ran this year gave me something to be happy about, some sort of highlight, if you will. Since I didn’t race race anything this year, I genuinely enjoyed myself at each race and walked away from each experience with something that made me happy. I generally don’t purchase races and decide to just run for fun because that can get expensive quickly, but this year, I feel like pregnant-racing gave me tons of opportunities to still be in the thick of the running community, even though I had taken a step back from the racing one (if that makes any sense). It just feels good to be part of something bigger, I guess. The pics from the races in each linked RR speak for themselves; I’m generally just happy to be out there in the first place.

Without a doubt, 2015 has been excellent, and I’m looking forward to 2016. Though I have big goals and plans in mind, I’m also very patient with this process and know that it took me a lot of time to get to where I was pre-pregnancy; with that in mind, I don’t expect to be back where I was anytime soon. At the risk of sounding like a shitty new ager, I don’t believe in comebacks, in a linear process of advancement; I guess you could say that I believe in something more recursive, in a non-linear journey wherein each “bump” or “setback” is just part of the process: an “opportunity,” if you will. It’s how I write, so I guess it makes sense that it’s also how I run.

To 2016!

2015 Berkeley Half Marathon race recap

2015 Berkeley Half Marathon race recap

A week and change ago, along with a few thousand other runners, I ran the Berkeley Half Marathon through the mean streets and hills of Berkeley and the Cal (UC-Berkeley) campus. The same company that manages the BHM also manages the SF Marathon, and I was fortunate to be a social media ambassador for both races this year (and have my races comped — thank you!). My family and I have lived in the Bay Area now for nearly two years, but I’ve spent virtually no time in Berkeley (and hadn’t run there at all), so I was excited about the opportunity to run the “not flat” course, using it as yet another fitness/endurance assessment of how my running was faring at about 3.5 months postpartum. A big bonus was that Chicago-turned-Berkeley galpal Meredith lives a block-ish from the race’s starting/finishing area, and Portlander Austin (whom I somehow had managed to not see in over a year) would be in town that weekend as well. I had also learned that SF buddy Travis would be running, so we made arrangements to rendezvous pre-race at Meredith’s with Austin, Meredith, Travis, and Jen. Big Sis was also along for the ride on race morning, since she’d be hanging with everyone not running, so while there were a lot of moving parts, it was bound to be a good (albeit complicated) morning.

I wanted to get a decent idea of how my fitness and endurance were coming along, so while I didn’t actually train for this race as I properly should for a half marathon — I’m talking about both HM specific intensity (speed) and distance — I knew that the mileage  and time on my feet I put in, a la long runs on the weekends, would more than likely cover me. Truth be told, I’ve never actually properly trained for a HM and have only run them during marathon training cycles, so without consulting with some experts, I wouldn’t know how to train for one … anyway. Tangential.

My goals for the race were two-fold: a) to finish the thing (always) and b) to post a 1:4x, probably somewhere in the 1:42+ range. I based that number mostly on whimsy but also somewhat on some very unscientific intuition and reflection. My thinking was this: my first half post-baby in 2011 was about 5 months postpartum and was a 1:44 on a very flat Chicago course, with a very different training/speed/volume history leading up to it (and with much more time off during pregnancy and postpartum). The BHM would be a tougher (hillier) course, no doubt, and I wouldn’t be as far along PP (about 3.5 months versus 5 months+), but my running training/speed/volume since 2011 looks virtually nothing like it did pre-2011. It’s not to say that I thought a 1:42 was in the bag (because newsflash, it never is), but my educated guess was that it would be doable, barring catastrophe.

Half-Marathon-Course-Map-15-01-01
what I was getting myself into

On race morning, A and I arrived to Meredith’s shortly after 6:30 and chilled with everyone before Travis and I left for a warm-up. I was so excited to be running and racing again, and while I did my usual pre-run/pre-race song and dance and ate/drank my usual stuff, my body was still throwing me all sorts of the pre-race nerves, like making me think I had to pee or poop 1000 more times (negative) or that I wasn’t physically ready to run (nope) or that my milk was going to come in and make me all engorged for a couple hours (nada – fed the baby in the wee hours and pumped before the warm-up). Minorly annoying, kinda funny, but also strangely satisfying to have these feelings again before a race for the first time in a long time. You know what I’m talking about.

Travis and I had similar time goals, so we decided to start the race together, though we soon got separated after about mile 1 or 2. The “not flat” course posts most of the its hills in the first 5 miles (and many seemingly right out of the gate). The first few miles also weaves you through downtown Berkeley (I think … or a downtown that’s very near the Cal campus) before taking you through campus and some neighborhoods. It’s all hilly, but in late November, especially through some of the ‘hoods, it’s also quite beautiful with some probably hella expensive homes, the tree cover, and the foliage’s changing colors.

free race pics FTW. I don't know where this is on course, but here's a pretty picture of a tree with pretty leaves.
free race pics FTW. I don’t know where this is on course, but here’s a pretty picture of a tree with pretty leaves.

As I do for probably more worse than better, I rarely looked at my watch and instead just took everything on effort, especially during the first five-ish miles when it seemed like we were climbing hill after hill, with very few flats in between. I kinda vowed to catch back up with everyone who was flying past me on the few flats between each ascent, though I don’t think my vows actually materialized. More than anything, I felt in control, ascending wasn’t all that gruelling, and I was having a blast. Sometimes when I run in a new-to-me location, I feel disoriented because I don’t know where I am, nor do I know where I’m going, and even though I had no sense of direction or orientation during the BHM, I felt strangely liberated by it. (Sidenote: sometimes I wonder if I fare better at races where I don’t know where I am. Does anyone else feel this way??).

again, not sure where this is (maybe Cal, judging from the building in the background?), but I am obvs stupidly happy
again, not sure where this is (maybe Cal, judging from the building in the background?), but I am obvs stupidly happy to be there. (sidenote: sandal dude behind me!)

I took a few gels around 4, 7, and maybe 10 — I had written the mile markers/aid station stops on my hand so I’d remember when to take them — and felt pretty solid. I had begun catching up to people through the back half of the course and, from what I could tell, was ahead of more people than were people ahead of me (if that makes any sense). I knew I wasn’t going at what was once my usual HM speed, but I wasn’t dwelling on it or comparing how I was doing now versus how I did before. I was fine with where I was and told myself, at the risk of sounding kinda silly, that I belonged in the race and belonged at the paces I was posting. Fun and gross fact: in basically all of my HMs I raced (or attempted to race) in 2014, my stomach threw a veritable shit storm and relegated me to port-a-potties or bushes mid-race with wonderful bouts of diarrhea (you’re welcome, and sorry). I got nothing to say for it except that running can sometimes hurt like hell. Fortunately, throughout the BHM, my stomach wasn’t throwing me any Code Browns, so as far as I was concerned, I was winning the thing. Feeling in control, having fun, not feeling the imminent need to go defecate in public somewhere — what more could I ask for.

and not choking on a gel mid-race also makes me happy (note: that guy's neck must have hurt like hell later... ouch)
and not choking on a gel mid-race also makes me happy

Around mile 10, on the out-and-back portion, I first saw Travis (and successfully side-5ed, wohoo!) and later, many folks in my RunningAddicts group who were there pacing. I kept feeling like my body was trying to surge and saw that I had dropped something around a 7:11 pace for mile 10, but I knew I couldn’t sustain that for the final 3 miles and kept trying to reign things in a bit. Though we had finished most of the climbs, there were still a little bit left, something like only 200′ over the last 3 miles — not much, for sure, but enough to make you feel it after running 10+ miles and climbing some in the first 5 miles.

For whatever reason, probably since I first learned my multiplication tables, I always tend to think that 8*4 is 36. I know it’s not, but for some reason, I always think that it is — I think everyone has a thing like this, be it with math or spelling — and around mile 10, when I started to feebly do some mental math, I initially got incredibly dismayed because I didn’t think it’d be physically possible for me to break 1:40, a goal that I had somewhat kept to myself because I thought it was completely unrealistic, if not irresponsible, for the training I’ve done lately. However, once I remembered the actual product to that 8*4 bugger, I damn near rejoiced because I thought that it was actually feasible — barring catastrophe — though I’d have to be very careful and intentional over the final few.

Those final couple hundred feet of climbing felt monstrous, though I was catching up to and passing people right and left (giving myself a huge confidence boost in the process), and ultimately, as I was coming down the finish chute (and after hearing Austin’s booming voice on my right) and saw Travis on the other side, I kicked with anything that I had left and came up with a 1:40:11 (fuck) for 13.17 miles — just missing breaking 1:40 and running almost-perfect tangents. Damn,  how quickly I forget the feeling of “really happy but just a tad miffed.” Racing, how wonderful and tough you are, you sly minx. (Garmin stuff here).

Austin got this great one of Travis just steps from finishing 13.1
Austin got this great one of Travis just steps from finishing 13.1

 

final: 317/3575 OA; 42/1722 women; 11/539 AG (30-39)
looks like my hair is on fire. final: 317/3575 OA; 42/1722 women; 11/539 AG (30-39)

As I suspected, it ended up being a really fun morning. Once I finished, I quickly connected with Travis and Jen, Meredith, Austin, and A, and grabbed A and walked with her and Travis through all the post-race vendor stuff. Travis and I each earned a special TSFM/Berkeley Challenge medal (for completing each race), which was neat, and before long, we all met up again and reconvened at Meredith’s before parting ways. While Travis and I were racing, apparently A and Austin, Jen, and Meredith were busy having a blast at some of the playgrounds nearby. Good morning for all 🙂

YIB0D7R7
PC: Austin

I’d definitely recommend the BHM. I had a really positive experience, and it definitely gave me the feedback I needed to figure out how things are coming along for me postpartum. Seeing friends always sweetens the experience, of course, and being able to bring Big Sis along also made the morning more fun. Thanks for the opportunity, BHM gang.

And with the feedback from the BHM (and the other races I’ve run this autumn as fitness/endurance assessments) in mind, and after a few more days of hemming and hawing (or heeing and hawing, because that makes me think of cowboys, which makes me laugh for no good reason) this eventually happened:

here we gooooooooooo!
here we gooooooooooo!

 

Thanks again to the fine folks at the Berkeley Half Marathon for allowing me to be a social media ambassador for your fine race in 2015. It was a blast, and if you find yourself in the Bay Area in the future during the BHM weekend, definitely look into the race. It’s a good one.